Wednesday, November 28, 2012


The last time I felt this crazy was in the picture above.. surrounded by boxes I was too tired to unpack... massively pregnant with the twins. 

Here's the part where I need to vent.. I was going to write a list of things I hate.. but I came up blank. Instead will you please listen to my sob story of the events this morning? 

The girls cried as soon as they woke up and saw that Daddy was again at Swim Practice. He was just there last night they reasoned.. why does he have to be there this morning too?? Took the time to shower, came downstairs and got everyone dressed and fed. Running a little behind so skipped my own breakfast and coffee while I got Frankie up and packed snacks. Trying to get everyone in coats when Frankie has a fit about something I didn't understand and coughs/screams out a whole mouthful of Cheerios onto her coat and mine. Burst into tears (for no reason?) and run to get paper towels whimpering and mumbling about my inability to do this (the things you said you'd never say in front of your children right?). Clean us up and hurry everyone to the car since we are now running late. Ice all over the windows. Well that's just great. Everyone in the car. Car is on heating up but ice still not melted. Grab baby wipes container and start scraping ice off the windows - it works! Take good care not to scrape away the "pond full of fish" that Ada has scratched into her window. Jump in car and off we go. Arrive at school. Why is the parking lot so empty? Where are the carpool people? Oh.. that's right. It's late start day today. We are an hour (AN HOUR) early. Laugh with the girls about how silly mommy is! Shall we get a breakfast treat to kill some time? Oh wait that place is full to the brim - not dragging the 4 of us in there only to have to re-pack everyone in the car. Drive around North Hills looking for other possibilities. Narrowly avoid getting into a wreck with TWO different women in Volvos who back out of the *&#^$^ parking spaces without even glancing behind them!!! The first time I slam on breaks so hard the girls say ouch! The woman sees me do this and calmly continues to back out without so much as a wave of apology. The second time I have to hit the gas to avoid some woman hitting Ada's door. What is HAPPENING PEOPLE?!?!! By now I am panting in frustration. The girls are asking me what "moronic idiot" means.. whoops. I tell them mommy needs to stop driving around and find somewhere to be still for a few minutes. We drive to the little pond and mill right across from the school. It is freezing outside this morning but I tell them it might be fun to go on a early morning nature walk. They are excited. Dear Jesus how I love those little girls. Get everyone out and take deep breaths while they blow "smoke" and examine the glistening frost on the leaves. We giggle about the pumpkin someone has tossed into the creek. We laugh at how cold the geese look in the water. We get back into the car and warm up again before heading off to school. Frankie is hungry because she didn't finish her breakfast before I forced us all out the door this morning. Ada and Margot both ask for a few of their ABC cookies from their snack bag to give to their baby sister. Their idea. Frankie munches happily and the big girls smile and tell me about how they will tell their teachers about our crazy morning. I quietly pray they have forgotten the "moronic idiot" part.

Now Frankie and I am home and I will gather my strength back and try to get something accomplished before we need to leave to pick up the girls. I am determined to laugh about this morning instead of crying. It wasn't really that bad after all .. everything just seems gigantic when you are exhausted and about to make the biggest purchase of your entire life. I have only just started to get weepy about leaving our neighborhood and our precious neighbors too... Deep breaths.

Tuesday, November 27, 2012


Thanksgiving was a lovely blur. A blur of which I took not a single photograph. Chasing a Frances Pauline will cause you to forgot your camera. Stephen took some shots of them in the big tub at Nana and Papas house. 

We are three days away from our closing. Three. I have spent just about every single morning of the last few weeks tying up various loose ends. I have to go get the certified check for the attorney tomorrow and after that we wait until Friday at 9am. Ho-ly cow. Should I be worried that I literally have 3 boxes packed? We have until the 14th to be out of this place and the two weeks ahead are going to be slam packed with cleaning, painting, updating and moving. Mom and Dad will be here Friday and all weekend helping. Mary gets here Sunday to start watching the girls while we work away over at the new house. The plan to move one room at a time as each is completed sounds very optimistic from where I sit. I plan to move the closets first. Then everything but the furniture... and then the furniture last of all and all at once with the help of our friends with trucks and muscles. None of this, of course, can happen until we get things painted. Can't really plan too carefully, have to be super flexible. I just keep reminding myself that no matter how much we actually get done we will be spending Christmas this year in our new house. 

The girls are starting to ask questions like "Will we bring our toothbrushes to the new house?" "What about our toothpaste?" " I don't want to leave Oliver all by himself!" This is starting to get real in their little minds. I am going to try my best to take pictures and post as we make progress so stay tuned. 

Thursday, November 15, 2012


More photo stalking from our hard drive. Found these images from Christmas 2010 here in Raleigh. That amazing Christmas that we had everyone here and it actually snowed. We also all got the stomach flu that year but I digress. Look how pretty these homes in our neighborhood are. I always saw myself living in an old Victorian home one day.  Then I married an artist/teacher. Ha! I kid. 

I will miss being able to take walks though this neighborhood. Particularly at night in the summer time. The girls are so big now we can't do the old after dark stroller adventures anymore anyway but that is ok. We have moved on to bigger and better things. Still I will miss this neighborhood and it's historic grandeur. Also I like to play a little game called "Wonder how much they pay to heat and cool that place?" when we pass on the humble sidewalk out front. 

My transition skills are not getting any better for anyone who is wondering. I really do suck at this. I have packed 2 boxes thus far and those are full of toys and were packed primarily to make it easier to clean up the living room on a daily basis. I don't feel guilty packing away certain toys because I know they will feel new again in 3 weeks when they are brought back out in the new house. 

I am weary but happily so tonight. Having finally ironed out another wrinkle in the buying process. We have granite chosen for our counter tops (a precious and super exciting surprise gift from Mom and Dad). We have paint colors chosen for each room (another precious and tremendous gift from Mom and Dad). We are starting with several new (to us) pieces of furniture that are actually period specific to the house and that makes my heart sing. Still every day is a battle lately. Take yesterday for instance. Stephen left for swim practice at 5:30am and Ada woke me at 5:38am. She wakes us every morning crying about her hair and how it is bothering her. I was able to settle her down (no easy feat.. can you imagine what it is like to start your day with a dear child fussing next to your head every morning over something that she won't let you fix? It is a hurdle.) and had her reading books while I showered and dressed.. was drying my hair when I head Margot's foot steps coming from her room to ours. Peaked out the door just in time to see her step on a pile of puppy poo and look up at me in horror. Oliver is feeling worse each day and has started pooping at random times in the house. I am not sure whom I felt more sorry for at the moment. Margot who was bleary eyed and shocked at what was happening. Oliver who was curled in a ball on our bed looking ashamed and shaking, or myself who was just reminding myself how productive it can be to wake up before 6am. I stopped and dealt with what needed to be dealt with. I regathered myself and began repeating the mantra my dad had told me the day before about how each day has enough trouble for itself. I didn't dare imagine what lay ahead. Just hold Margot tight and dry the confused tears as I bathed her soiled heels in warm soapy water. Next we were out of oatmeal. No matter since I wasn't that hungry anyway. Then Frankie woke up and refused to eat her breakfast in the high chair. Choosing instead to spill her Cheerios across the floor, carpet, table, couch at least 5 times before we left for school. The girls cried about their shoes. They cried about their coats. I kept my spirits up and prayed it would help theirs as we drove to school singing Shoo Fly and talking about what we were thankful for that we could see out our windows. Then I went grocery shopping at Aldi and remembered why I used to love that store so much. Spent half what I would have normally spent somewhere else. Then I came home and the house drama started. It wasn't that big of a deal but there was something we two parties needed to come to an agreement on and we just hadn't found the right scenario yet. Took the rest of the morning to find it. Then time to get the girls. Then home and so worn out my body was aching. By that point in the day I want so badly to be able to accomplish things while the girls rest but I am bone tired and can do nothing but sit and spin my wheels about where to start .. or lay on the couch and doze to the sounds of Curious George. Some days I just have to laugh. I laugh at how overwrought I get over the tiniest wrinkles. I know this is because my life is currently very wrinkly. I laugh at how I can prepare delightfully homecooked meals one week and then tonight I was so drained from the day that they got peanut butter and jelly and I just stared off into space. I laugh because I turn on the news and always wish I hadn't. Tonight I am not laughing. I am giggling. Giggling at the thought of what new wonders await me in the morning. Giggling because my husband will never EVER stay awake long enough to watch Boardwalk Empire with me. Giggling because this Christmas we will have our own door to decorate. Some things are worth feeling scattered for.

Sunday, November 11, 2012

Wee Hours

Why is it so hard for me to go to bed on Sunday night? I know I will be tired tomorrow morning. Yet I can't stop rifling through photo files on the computer. Checking FB to see if there is anything new there.. making sure my email inbox is telling the truth about not having anything new in it. Sigh. I am not ready for the week to start. I am never ready for the week to start. The weekends are always too short. Tonight I even found an old picture from Stephen's trip to Greece several years ago. Look at that guy standing there in .. Corinth? Worlds away from where I was at that moment. I was here, moving us from one townhouse to this house down the street (with the help of friends and family of course). Tomorrow I go with my Dad to look at the new house one more time to see how much paint we might need and take some measurements and such. Three weeks.. the closing is in three short weeks. I have got to get it together and start accomplishing some things around here!!! And on that note I will end this achingly dull post and go to bed.

Saturday, November 03, 2012

Live version

Frankie in a vest

Post bath Frankie wearing my vest. Pretty sure that is something everyone needs to see.