On my way home tonight...

..I went the underground super secret spy tunnel route to the N train under 1251 Avenue of the Americas. When I emerged, it was twilight and Times Square was just starting to glow. For some reason, when it gets cold like it was today, Times Square just starts to feel kind of magical in a way that makes me wish I had a balcony nearby that I could sit and view it from. But I don't, so off to Trader Joe's I went to collect milk and eggs and ingredients for the vegetable soup that we are having tomorrow night. The line was wrapped around the entire interior of that crowded space. Sometimes I liken grocery shopping around here to a meditative yoga practice. One must take a deep breath, clear one's mind of things that are waiting to be done outside of this present environment. Wait patiently for your turn to enter the frozen foods aisle. Wish kindness to all God's creatures who show up to do their day's shopping. The kindly elderly lady who insists on pushing one of those little red carts up and down each lane to support her loaf of bread and bottle of cranberry juice while she wonders at the marvels of frozen tamales and salmon steaks. The NYU student there showing their parents just how well they are able to eat on that $25 a week they have for sustenance. The political analyst that needed a few extra Luna bars and cups of yogurt to get her through the week, chatting animatedly on her cell about the merits of the current democratic front runners (she feels Obama is too standoffish). There are the married couples that tag-team the list, one holds their place in the interminable line while the other gathers the necessary items, bringing them back to home base. Stephen and I take this approach when we go together. Tonight it was just me and I squirmed my way around the store gathering alone, careful not to exceed 12 items as that line was only wrapped around to the bread section and the other stretched beyond the produce. I stood in my spot and thought about my day. I investigated the new product shelves as the line crept towards the registers. I felt entirely at peace, smiling in a daze at the woman who charged over my toe with her cart. I think I was even humming Saint Saens Danse Macabre, my favorite classical piece at this time of year. Maybe that sounds a little spooky but if I was not embarrassed to take a picture in there on days like this.. you would see and understand that you practically have to put yourself in a trance to get in and out of there with your sanity intact. I have mastered this skill and now look on my visits to TJ's as the ultimate exercise in patience, particularly after a long day at work.

I can hear the fog horns from the tug boats and barges blowing out on the water. I am reminded every time I hear that sound, that we live on an island. Surrounded by water on all sides. I sometimes forget just how close we are to that water. I almost always mistake the first tug boat blast of the evening for my cell phone, vibrating somewhere in the house.

Good-night all.
xoxo

Quote of the week:

"Never follow a hippie to a second location."
Jack Donagey - 30 Rock

Song/Video of the week (possibly the year, thanks Skiles.. I have a new obsession)
"Business Time" - Flight of the Concords
(see link at top right of the screen... you know you want to click it..Each version is a masterpiece but I recommend the 2nd box down for beginners)

untitled

I set out to write a more serious post today but as you can see from my two previous attempts this evening, I am having difficulty concentrating. This will be my 3rd and final attempt to say what is really on my mind.

I got a call last night from my brother, John. I was already asleep so he left a voicemail, which I retrieved this morning, letting me know that he would be in the city today on business and would I have time to get together before he had to head back to Florida with the rest of his management team. I called him back to let him know that I would make myself available and that he could call me when he was ready and I would meet him wherever he was.. as long as it wasn't too far from Rock Center, I do abide by the 1 hour lunch rule at my office. I left another voicemail a little before lunch time, reiterating my interest in getting together. I carried my cell phone with me to the copy room, the kitchen, the conference room to listen to the caterer give his pitch for the tasting we had scheduled today. I trudged back to my office afterward feeling like he might not be able to meet up anyway, maybe he wasn't able to get a free moment. It was already after 2:30 so I threw myself back into the expense reimbursements I had been generating for the fall call-back students. My phone buzzed, startling me as it always does (I should really change that setting). It was him. He and his work friends were headed to Bar Americain on 52nd between 6th and 7th, very near my office, and would I like to meet them there. I dropped everything. I was in the middle of sending a reimbursement request to another law firm and I had to force myself to finish putting it in the envelope before grabbing my tote bag and bolting out of the office. I wore my heels instead of changing into my walking shoes, since it was so close by. I called Stephen to announce that I was on my way to meet John and that I might need to work a little late tonight to make up for the extra time that I might end up spending with him, constituting an extended lunch break. Stephen was amenable as always and asked that I give his greeting to John. I hurried along the sidewalk, finally reaching the flimsy brass revolving door and pushed my way into the empty restaurant. I tried to explain to the hostess that I was there to meet a party that was already seated and that they may not have had a reservation, all the while glancing around for any sign of my little brother. I saw his group in the corner, his back was to me. He turned and rose from his seat, calmly walking over to give me a hug around the shoulders. I wanted to grab him in a bear hug and drag him out of that midtown hell-hole to a bench in the park where we could sit and visit, just the two of us. Resisting this urge, I followed him back to his table and proceeded to make small talk with his colleagues until they began to talk amongst themselves and we were able to visit a little, one on one. He gave me the latest update on Mariel and Zin and explained the event that he and his team were here in New York for. I sipped my Coke while he discussed his options for using up his remaining vacation days before the end of the year. He can't take off in November or December so he has the few remaining days in October to use up the 5 days he has left. He sat there talking to me.. talking to his work buddies... In his navy suit and pale blue tie. My brother, here in New York for the day. My brother in midtown eating lunch. John meeting me for lunch in New York. It was so surreal. I never see my brother and to spend unexpected time together was hard to grasp. Before I knew it we were saying goodbye outside on the sidewalk and I was teetering my way back to the office. Back to my everyday. Back to those people that I spend more hours with than my family. Back to tiptoeing around bad moods and feigning polite interest in the wellbeing of those returning from extended medical leave. These are the sort of days that make me feel caged. Caged in my tiny windowless office (yes, I have an office now.. but no window). Caged in my highrise in midtown Manhattan. Caged in New York. Caged in the subway, I actually had an attack of claustrophobia on the way home tonight. I feel trapped on days like this. I don't really know why. Normal people meet their siblings from out of town for lunch and then head back to work when their hour is up. That is a normal thing to do. Somehow that sort of departure from my everyday rattles me out of my dazed existence and reminds me that I am not at home. I am painfully aware that I am not a New Yorker and reminded of the fact that I can't just drop in on my family whenever I feel like it... thankful that John had the opportunity to drop in on me.

The Eye Of The Tiger

Malani and Michael got married on Saturday!!!!!!!! YEAH!!!!! WOOOO HOOOOOO!!!!!!
After a very short and super sweet ceremony the happy couple entered the reception from a second level balcony in the ball room to the tune of Eye of the Tiger slapping each other high fives and doing a spectacular Rocky III impersonation (sans Adrienne .. of course).



Early in the evening everyone was clean (pronounced sober), wrinkle free and pleasant. See how happy Carol and Kane are ?! So sweet!! Sadly, our pictures didn't turn out so well so I can't show you how snazzy Stephen and looked in our formal attire but believe me when I say we were smokin'! We had such a fantastic time from start to finish. The reception was a whirlwind of dancing with a few forks full of the delectable fare thrown in for energy sake.. I have never been to a wedding where they started dancing before the first course even came out! It was all fun and games....... and then someone at our table threw up... UNDER the table.. and suddenly the food was not nearly as appetizing and everyone hit the dance floor and didn't look back!



...and that is how we found ourselves here.. at the end of the evening. The blushing bride having taken refuge on the floor to rest her tired feet.... Carol's shoe carefully placed in her cleavage for safe keeping.. Stephen offering her an avocado from one of the centerpieces .. fresh guacamole anyone ?



Marji...? How about you.. fresh guac sounds good about now, right ?



Atta girl.

Penguin Blood and Carnage

Oh wow, Dad! I would love to take care of that penguin for you! Please ? I promise to be gentle with him and treasure him and give him a good home. I've always wanted a penguin!



His eye..? Well yeah, it just sorta ...you know..fell out when I was carefully carrying him into the living room. He can still see out of the other one.. we are still friends, don't worry.



grmph mrph..grrrr..mmmrph grmp rrrrrrr..



.....what? Oh that!? That's just snow... nothing to see here people.

For crying out loud...

...Gore ..Nobel Peace Prize?!?!! I think I just threw up a little in my mouth. Ann Coulter (sp?) jamming her foot in her mouth yet again ?!?! Sigh. Sometimes the morning news just doesn't start your day off on the right foot.

You know what does start the day off on a good foot ? The memory of the date you went on last night with your husband that's what!

It was raining last night when we headed out from 30 Rock to grab a bite to eat and go see the re-released edition of Blade Runner The Final Cut. We headed down the village to find a laid back place to get some some comfort food and landed at Fiddlesticks, which is sort of an Irish pub type place. Stephen had bangers and mash, I had Sheppard's Pie and we both had a nice cold beer to go with it all. We sat discussing our day and plans for the not so distant future as the rain trickled down the window.



Couldn't resist a photo of Papaya Dog's presidential plea.



This is the first movie we have gone to see at the Ziegfeld theater. I had no idea it was so close to my office - 54th between 6th and 7th. It's an old fashioned theater and Stephen thinks that this is the theater that was the subject of that Seinfeld episode where Kramer tries to save the theater with Loyd Brawn ... anyone..? Anyone ...? Beuller... ?



This place is not only huge but beautiful, as most older theaters tend to be. The ticket taker bellowed good-naturedly "Step right up to see Blade Runner!! I wanna see some knee shakin' excitement folks.. you are here to see Blade Runner!!!!".. it was very carnival-esque. Up the tiny escalator we went with the throngs of film buffs and sci-fi nerds, complete with shaggy hair, beards and black rimmed glasses. The tiny knot of Peter Jackson look-a-likes in the center of the picture above are the early bird crowd. Like us they arrived way in advance to make sure they had a prime seat for the picture. By the time the movie actually started it was practically a full house - which is saying something considering the size of this place.

The film itself was epic. I have seen Blade Runner many times but never on the big screen and the extra footage that was added, along with the far less ambiguous ending made this one of our top ten date nights. It-was-incredible. If you live in NY or close by, and like this film in it's older versions (how can you not like it..? it's a classic!!) I highly recommend a trip to the Ziegfeld. I left the theater feeling transformed, as I often do after seeing these types of larger than life movies. Hurrah for Philip Dick and his imagination.



Finally.. I couldn't resist this shot either. This is a stall in the ladies room of the Ziegfeld. Umm.. yes.. there is actually a pedestal sink in each stall, complete with soap dispenser and paper town dispenser. You just don't see that everyday.

Belated Camping Details..

Stephen and I (and Oliver) had a great time this past weekend on our camping trip to the Catskills. The funny thing is that if I give you all the details, it could actually be classified as the worst trip we have been on.

Stephen carefully chose our spot way in advance, to make sure that it was off on it's own and nice and private. Unfortunately the map the campground has online (you have to make reservations as this state park .. ) is very misleading. The site that looked so private and secluded online, turned out to be right across from the campground entrance, one of the bath houses etc. You can see all that in the photo below. Stephen was devastated. Also, the campsites are right on top of each other... you can see that in the photo above. I had a migraine both days, I took medicine and they went away pretty fast but it still left me a little weak feeling. The second day a troop of Boy Scouts moved into the sites next to us on Saturday (loud teenage boys - aaahhh the peace and quiet of the wilderness). We got rained on twice on Saturday.. the first time while we were preparing our dinner over the fire.. the rain dampened our charcoal that we were cooking over but as we watched the promising orange glow we were excited by the idea that it had to stop raining eventually and when it did our food would probably be perfectly cooked!! Not so.. it didn't get cooked enough to eat .. the first time ever that our campfire meal didn't work. I could go on but I am going to switch gears here.

Despite all of the above that made out trip seem like an unfortunate series of events, we had an amazing time. See, that's just how nature starved we Brooklyn dwellers have been lately. Nature STARVED. I won't lie, when we arrived and saw that our spot was steps from the entrance we were not thrilled.. there were a couple of forced moments. But we both agreed that "it is what it is" and as the campground was booked solid, it wasn't like we could do anything to change it. So we resolved to have a good time to matter what and we did. We drank in the smell of the fallen leaves all around us - heavenly. When our dinner didn't work out we shrugged, started another fire after the rain let up, and pulled out the leftover hot dogs from the night before. We had a no make-up no shower weekend, which felt amazing in the crisp cool weather (meaning we were not all sweaty and sticky and gross). We heard owls at night, actually the first time I have ever heard one in the wild. We saw a huge black bear on our way home. He/she was walking next to the road until someone honked their horn and he/she turned and ran back into the safety of the forest.

If this trip taught me anything it's that Stephen and I are desperate to be near mountains and wooded areas. We fit pretty well here in the city but I am constantly reminded that we truly belong in a more rural area. Or at least within easy driving distance to said rural area, and no the fight to get out of the city and on your way north is not an "easy driving distance". One of these days .. we hope :) Despite my list of unfortunate details at the beginning of this post, please believe me when I say we both had an incredible time !! It wasn't the blue ridge (my personal fav) but it was time away from the city, outdoors, with my best friend and that is worth more than anything I can think of at the moment.

And now.. the tour..



Our sweet set up. We are very minimal campers and usually have no air mattress or camp stove. We like to rough it. This trip we had my birthday camp stove and we actually brought out air mattress with us. Good decisions both.



Stephen makes a mean breakfast, complete with espresso !!!



The fruits of his labor. My fried eggs (egg whites only of course - for those of you who don't know I can't eat the yellow part) pan toasted English Muffin with strawberry jam and plenty of bacon. So good!


A very sleepy Oliver waking up in the tent and ready for his walk.



Our Saturday hiking trip. We didn't go the whole way because frankly we just didn't feel like tiring ourselves out and we wanted to enjoy part of the day at the site. We did go far enough to find a fantastic lunch spot and sit for awhile and enjoy the surroundings.



Beautiful. Not another human being in site.



My "thousand mile stare". I did that a lot. It takes awhile for me to fully decompress.



Last but not least.. my boys relaxing by the fire. Oliver got himself into that chair and curled up for an afternoon nap. What can I say ? Even our dog knows how to kick back!

bump..

..no, not that kind of bump..I cracked my shin on the subway today (slipped on a piece of GARBAGE on the train and smacked it on the edge of one of the seats).. and now I have a huge painful purple bump on my shin. Sigh. We are going camping tomorrow and I am afraid I will be in too much pain to hike :( Please pray it gets better since this will be the first time we have actually gone to the mountains around here this year.. see you guys on Sunday!!!!

Do you..

..hold your breath for a few seconds after accidentally having to walk through someone's sneeze cloud ?

..feel that a 15 minute walk to the CVS on Lexington and 53rd, and a stop to pick up a hamburger and fries at GoodBurger constitutes a decadent lunch break ?

..wish that ChapStick only came in Strawberry Flavor ?

..tear up every time you see a fire fighter, police officer, or member of the armed forces in uniform ?

..think that Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind is the most romantic and inspiring film since you watched Wild Hearts Can't Be Broken when you were 13 ?

..wish that you were sitting next to Stephen up there on that boulder watching the waves crash in Maine ?

I do.

xoxo

stuck

No, I am not so desperate for a baby that I have started dressing Oliver up in human clothes. Stephen and the monkey here were wrestling and Stephen threw his shirt over Ollie to confuse him and Ollie got disoriented in the confusion and stuck his head right out of the sleeve of the shirt! He had to be untangled by one of the "adults" he lives with. I love that look in his eye.. caught and still completely prepared and expecting for Stephen to pounce on him :)

I am feeling strangely light and giddy tonight. Like I have just had a tickle fight and lost miserably. I guess I had not noticed the absence of my own laughter until tonight when everything Stephen did or said was so funny I could hardly contain myself. Having re-read what I just wrote it does actually sound like something is wrong with me. I have not been drinking and I never do drugs on Mondays. Maybe it's some lovely new aura.. I have had a migraine everyday for the past week..if so I must say I prefer this to my usual visual deficits and nausea. Such an odd feeling, it's like I have helium in my veins.

Do you ever feel like you and the people around you are all in on the same joke but pretending not to know about it ? I do. When I am riding on the train on those mornings where there is an elbow in my rib cage and a backpack catching my hair .. sometimes I feel like laughing out loud or saying something like "Boy.. Monday's bad enough without having to stand all the way to Manhattan .. am I right folks??" Then I come to my senses and remember that not only are these people around me not in on my "joke" but the last thing they want to do is figure out where to direct their eyes after some lunatic like myself says some "we are all in this together" comment that everyone else can hear. Thankfully my "team commuter" moments are few and far between and I rarely verbalize anything other than " 'scuse me" to my fellow riders.

I am feeling seriously weird ya'll .. so I am going to bed now.

xoxo

..of 25 cent flowers and a new pea coat..

Happy Birthday to me !!!!! With the generous contributions of Mary and Larry, Elsie, Matt and Lonna, Carol and Abigail (whsoo that's a lot of birthday checks and JCrew gift cards!!!) ... I am pleased to announce that I am the proud owner of a new JCrew Classic Pea Coat (in Heather Charcoal)!!!! I have had the same Pea Coat since high school and I am so excited to be able to upgrade :) Thanks everybody!!!!!






On the way home tonight, I was listening to my 80s mix and admiring what I took to be a harvest moon, when I was stopped on the sidewalk by one of the little boys on my block. He and his friend were selling "flowers" for a dollar and he wondered if I would buy one. I told him that sadly I did not have any dollar bills. He asked if I had any "cents" and said maybe I could buy one of his "flowers" with some of that. I am a sucker for industrious little kids so I hauled out my wallet and found a quarter. Both little boys offered me their wares and I chose the specimen above because I was assured by the vendor that if I "put it in the dirt it will grow". Of course what these boys were actually selling were the tiny tips of various plants and flowers from their parents yards... I know I am the most horrible of suckers but I love to be suckered in by those sweet innocent faces. I mean seriously how could I possibly refuse ?!?! The bartering and transaction alone made me forget every annoying thing that happened at work today.

When my brother was little he was one of those kids. Selling the daisies he pulled up in the strawberry field when we went strawberry picking in the summer. He went door to door in our neighborhood selling "bouquets" and came back with a bounty of pocket change that our sweet neighbors most willingly handed out. I can remember thinking that he must have been so annoying going door to door like that, bothering our neighbors. Now I know that he was just a breath of fresh air at the end of their work day.

Finally I have to comment on a piece I read in Newsweek on the way home tonight. Apparently Kathy Griffin won an Emmy Award for her reality show "My Life on the D-list"... and I quote...

"in her acceptance speech she explained that while other actors might thank Jesus for such an honor she wouldn't consider it. 'Suck it, Jesus,' she exuberantly added, waving her statuette in the air, 'This award is my God, now.' "

The article goes on to explain that "outrage from Christian groups predictably followed" as various Christian leaders appeared on talk shows to complain that if she had said "Suck it Jews " or "Suck it Muhammad" no one would have been laughing. Newspapers reported that E! television would edit the speech before airing the show the next weekend, which "predictably" brought on outraged responses from liberal groups claiming censorship. Soon some atheistic youths in Hawaii jumped on board and launched a site called ..wait for it.. "suckitjesus.com" where they gathered support for Kathy Griffin's cause as networks tried to decide whether or not to air her comments. Some Christian theater in TN took out $180 K in full page ads in USA Today "decrying Griffin's remarks and pleading for a new civility". Sigh. I do my best not to be what I consider a "Hyper Christian". That means I stand on the sidelines in these situations and refuse to jump on the bandwagon unless I am super passionate about the true meat of the cause at hand and have considered the issue from all sides. I love Jesus, I am super passionate about that. But listen here folks.... Jesus loves Kathy Griffin. Think about that for a minute. The Bible promised that being a Christian would not be easy. We were never meant to be the popular crowd. What Griffin said was wrong and offensive but let's show everyone what it really means to follow Jesus.. don't play their game guys. Turn that other cheek. It's a losing battle. It always has been. It always will be. I have always felt that it is times like these that Christians have the greatest opportunity to witness by truly showing the love of Christ. Christ doesn't take out ads in USA Today. Our God is a just and merciful God. Let's rest in that knowledge and not let a smart ass comment by a spoiled Hollywood performer ruffle our spiritual feathers. I might have just ignited a firestorm of commentary but... if this is an issue that gets you riled up or you don't agree with my opinion on the matter I'd love to hear from you. Seriously.... comment away!
xoxo

Alright already!!!!!

I know I know I know.. I have been MIA for a few weeks. Sorry guys. My trip to NC was a whirlwind that only got crazier when I got back to Brooklyn. Work has been insane.. insane... insane. I have more to do than I could get done in 3 months of overtime. Sorry all you young promising lawyers out there but recruiting you guys.. really blows!!! It's just a mountain that grows and grows and never lets up or slows down. Even with 2 of us doing it full time now.. just nuts. Lunch has become a thing of the past. I try my hardest to get there as early as I can and work through lunch and pray I can leave by 6:30 or 7:00 at the earliest.. anyway.. let's see... what have I been up too lately....

I went home for my birthday as you all know. Had a great trip.. a little hectic .. but great none the less. The picture up there is of the birthday cards Stephen made for me.. yes those are real butterfly wings. The lower left black and white is a clue to what my presents were ...



This is the amazing devils food coconut cake that Stephen made for me when I got back from NC on the 12th. The first occupant of my cake cover and it tasted like heaven!!! Stephen has vowed to make me a different cake every year for my birthday.. no two alike.. so far so good :)



I spent my actual birthday morning with my best friend Ellen. I spent the night there after taking Stephen to the airport in Raleigh on Sunday afternoon.. Ellen made me another type of coconut cake.. her mothers recipe. She and David sang happy birthday that night and we had cake before we went to bed. Ellen and I stayed up until the wee hours of the morning talking and then in the morning I was awakened by Ellen and Mr. Seth and their bounty of birthday presents!!! So many presents I had to choose my favorite to represent the pile.. that's right folks, those are true vintage PanAm glasses .. amazing! Getting to spend my birthday with Ellen really made the day. It's so relaxing and nice to hang with those who know you best.

I drove home in the early afternoon to hang out with and eat dinner with my Aunt B. I haven't gotten to spend that much time with Aunt B since I don't even know when. We talked and ate dinner in and generally had a fantastic visit. Made it hard to come back to NY.



This is part of my birthday present from Stephen.. a set of pots and pans to add to our camping equipment. He also gave me a camp stove... and.... we are going camping in the Catskills in 2 weeks!!!!! YAY!!!!!!!!!!! We have always been "if it can't be cooked on/in/over the fire you don't eat it on a camping trip" kind of folks but .. I am totally down with being able to whip up coffee and warm soup on a stove. He knows me too well :)



The biggest surprise on my birthday came from my sweet daddy. A mandolin!!!!!! A black one at that... I am SO sure that if Jack White has a mandolin it's a black one so I was super thrilled by this!! For those of you who don't know, the mandolin has the same strings as violin (an instrument that I have been playing since I was 9) so though it's a different musical concept for my brain to pluck instead of bow I am still in familiar territory. I played David Shingler's when we were in Maine for awhile and fell head over heels .. I have always been a fan of mandolin players of all shapes and sizes but had never played it myself until then... when I have 2 seconds to sit down I will really learn how to play it... for now it's just this amazing present that was a total surprise sitting like a wink from my dad in the corner of the living room.. such an amazing gift.

So I was in NC for my older brother Page's 40th birthday party.. it was a great party and a good time was had by all. It was so nice to see everyone.. I got spend a lot of time with Gram and John and Mariel were home with Zin so we saw them too. I wish I could be more eloquent about how much I loved my trip home and how it made me feel and all of that but ... I tired ya'll. Really tired. I feel like all I do is run to work and run home and try to spend some time with Stephen before passing out and doing it over again. This is no way to live folks.... seriously... I am not living. Just surviving... barely. Reaching the end of my quickly fraying rope here. I just want a vacation. A real vacation where I can go away and not come back for about 5 weeks or so... just want to get away from everything and clear my head. I feel foggy. I hate that feeling.

This weekend I was in Miami for a bachelorette party for one of my work buddies. Yeah, I don't want to hear it. "if you are so tired why were you at a bachelorette party in South Beach?? Hmmmm? That's why you are so tired .. you are having to much fun!!" ...um. No. I was tired before I went and frankly feel no worse for the wear now. Not to mention when I was originally invited it sounded like a great idea.. how was I to know I would be so drained for Fall OCI ??? At any rate I had a great time ...I literally sat on the beach on Saturday and just stared out at this.....


... no reading .. no iPod.. just water.. and sky.. and the occasional topless chick. Yeah you can go topless on Miami beaches. No, I did not partake. This was my first real bachelorette destination get away like this and will most definitely be my last. I had an amazing time seriously.. but all that dancing and hanging out wears a girl out and frankly I was so homesick for Stephen I could hardly stand it. Even Malani, the bachelorette herself, said that this was her last bachelorette party she planned to attend :) She was done in too!! It was good times but at some point in your life you have really had enough of beating drunk guys away from your behind and screaming "I'm married!!!!!.. Yes..MARRIED (point to rings on left hand)!!!!!!" over the music. I passed that point long before this trip and I was brutally reminded of just how much I despise single guys that hang out in clubs this weekend. That's all I am going to say about that. The highlights of the trip were hanging out at the pool and on the beach with Malani and the rest of the girls. We had a great time visiting and enjoying ourselves and I am super excited to see everyone again at the wedding next month :)

So there you have it, Madam Ellen aka Blog Watcher Nazi ;) this is a fast forward of what I have been up to with no emotion thrown in because I have been too tired to really go into the way I feel about things. But I am glad we did this.. we will have to it again real soon :)
Seriously though... I am hanging on by a thread here people. Can't you tell??!!?!! Let's hope there is some light at the end of the tunnel soon .. working on keeping my spirits up but just mentally and physically exhausted with a capital E. Will try to update more regularly.. I know these marathon posts are a bit much.
xoxo

My hero...

This is a picture of Stephen saving my life last week...I had a horrible week.. horrible.. terrible.. I was exhausted and cranky and had to pack for Miami to leave the next morning and was really starting to wish that I had not agreed to go... he called me at work and asked me what he could do to help.. "Take care of dinner!" I said " Go to the grocery store and by a bunch of good food, don't worry about the cost I want good food and lots of it! Comfort food.. and a desert of some sort. Please..." He happily agreed and when I got him he had prepared a Mexican feast with sparkling Limeade to drink and key lime pie for desert. What an amazing man I am married to. All I had to do was put on my comfy clothes and sit down and eat all of the amazing food he bought and fixed. Stephen fixing me dinner is not a rarity around here.. I must give him credit for that since he fixes dinner more than I do sometimes (ok lately most of the time). Hearing his sweet voice at work and coming home to his smiling face handing me a plate was just the tonic I needed from a brutal work week. Gotta love that servant's heart my boy has.

Lately

Tuesday, Stephen and I woke super early to climb the tiny ladder to our roof and watch the lunar eclipse. We took a very sleepy Oliver along and made it time to see the sliver of the moon slide from view. Across the river the city was stirring to wakefulness and Lady Liberty's lamp shown clear and bright. A special early morning treat, even if I did spend my morning at work downing several triple grande lattes and a few cups of office brew.



Out of a personal necessity for some major change in my everyday, Stephen and I re-did the bedroom recently. For those of you who have had the pleasure of staying at the 3rd floor Chateau, you will surely appreciate the lovely wide walkway though the chambre. No more stubbed toes on midnight trips to the bathroom.



This weekend I was extremely self indulgent. We went to "The Garage" on Saturday and I bout these lovely Goebel birds. I am not the figurine type but... I could not pass them up. Seems to cheer whatever room they roost in. So far they have roosted in all but the salle de bain - I keep moving them around.



I was also unable to pass up the necklace and earrings above. They are from the 30s and the man who sold them to me at the garage gave me a sick deal. They are the real deal. Exquisite persimmon glass beads. They have a wonderful weight to them. Absolutely in love with this set.



This fab milk glass lamp was part of the bedroom revision. I found it at "Trailer Park" in Park Slope. Perfection at a super bargain price. Much prettier in person.



My trip to the "Trailer Park" also yielded a long sought after cake cover. Not sure of the decade for this one but I was ecstatic! My mom has an aluminum number that I have lusted after since she found it at a thrift store. These are so hard to come by. Can't wait to bake something!!



The most extravagant purchase for the bedroom was the quilt. It's from Anthropologie and I have been lusting after it for a few months. I finally decided to take the plunge. I love it. Cheers the whole place. Just enough change to get the stale feeling out of my ocular nerves.

We are still going to get some Flor squares for the walkway and possibly some for the kitchen but that can wait until it gets a bit colder.

These past weeks have seen very little in the way of good rest for this blogger. Recruiting season is in full swing at work and I feel consistently behind the 8 ball. Doesn't seem to matter how early I arrive or how late I stay, still come home feeling overwhelmed and exhausted. Oh well... I did agree to join the recruiting team...I knew it would be like this. Builds strength of character, eh?

As if I haven't had enough difficult decisions of late, my big boss in LA threw me yet another curve ball at dinner the other night. We were all out to dinner (Carol, Abigail, Melissa, Korina and I) with said boss and we inquired to him about the current search for an Office Manager in our DC Office, as in "Do you have any good candidates ?" I will skip to the point of the story and tell you that he proceeded to turn to me and ask if me I wanted to move to DC. Yes, he was serious. I thanked him for the flattering offer and promised to at least mention it to Stephen. Stephen, not wanting to limit our options, told me he would be willing to consider it...and off I went. Spending the next few nights in sleepless agony, turn down an offer to pursue a position with a six figure salary or accept the chance to dive into the interview gauntlet with the DC Partners knowing that if I emerged as the successful candidate that I would have to move to yet another city where I would have to start from scratch. Such are the stupid problems I seem to encounter in life. So piddling and silly. But for someone who is trying to help her husband take over the role of bread-winner and start a family as a stay at home mother... well life is never simple. Not for anyone. Life has become a series of decisions and choices. After much prayer and consultation with loved ones I have decided to say no thank you. Sure, I may never really be able to be a stay at home mom... but I can certainly continue in that direction. I have wanted nothing more than that since I was a little girl taking my doll with me to Pizza Hut and changing her little doll diaper in the booth. I never went anywhere without a diaper bag and a doll. I think it's ok to pursue my truest deepest desire right now. Anyway..for all the discussion I engaged in on the DC matter.. I never felt a peace about it. I think it's important to know yourself and I know myself enough to know that a move to DC might do me in emotionally. What a sap right? What a weakling ... well...yes I am .. and proud of it. I am proud that I have true goals that need following and that I am strong enough not to be distracted from the life Stephen and I have worked so long and hard to attain. I am not ashamed that these goals consist of babies and workshops and a washer and dryer in my living space. I'm going to stay the course. Geez I sound like such a sappy lunatic but you have no idea how much I agonized over this decision.. trying to make sure I wasn't turning down something the Lord was trying to bless me with..if you know me you know I have been a miserable wreck all week. Such decisions have severe side effects on me. Anyway... I didn't much feel like writing ... as evidenced by my lack of posting.

Now I am enjoying the last moments of my 3 day weekend. I finished "The Time Travelers Wife" on Friday and find myself wishing I not been so greedy. Such an amazing book, I should have savored it a bit longer. I always get a little blue after a really great book. I get sort of homesick for the characters. Stephen and I finished Harry Potter a few weeks back and as it was the end of the series it was much easier to take. I was so pleased she chose to write a epilogue. I thought that added a nice note of comfortable finality.

Stephen and I will be going to NC sans Oliver on Thursday. Page is turning 40(?!?!?!?) and John and I are traveling home to be there for the party. I can't WAIT to get home! We decided to leave the pup since traveling can be hard on him and our neighbors really enjoy taking care of him - they get to have a sweet cuddly dog for the weekend .. who wouldn't love that :)

Stephen and Oliver are watching another Civil War disc, I am going to join them. Hope everyone had a fantastic weekend.

xoxo

Two dollars to play two dollars to win..

"...six players for a choice prize..six players choice prize.. I need six players for a choice prize.. two dollars to play to dollars to win ..six players for a choice prize..."

Stephen and I spent Saturday afternoon at Coney Island. We have not been since the winter trip we took to the Aquarium where we happened upon the Polar Bear Club doing their thing. This time we came to play some serious Skeeball and ride the infamous Cyclone. We decided to make that our first stop. This wooden roller coaster is slathered in 246 layers of shiny white paint and the men that work the ride are as much a part of the experience as the hand painted signs that warn you to secure not only your glasses and hats but also your wig when entering the ride. Stephen and I decided to go balls out and ride in the very last car. We far underestimated the power of the Cyclone. I have never been so whipped around and beaten up on a ride in my life! I have been on many wooden roller coasters but none like this one. I felt as though I had been strapped to block of lead and pushed over the edge of a steep cliff. Our screams were genuine as we were whipped around the turns and hurtled down the dips feeling as though we might fly right out of the tiny car. It was probably the most fantastic coaster ride I have ever been on. When it was over we stumbled out of the car, rubbing our wounds and unable to stop laughing. You know you have been on a fantastic ride when you leave unable to wipe the smile from your face. I don't even mind the bruised thigh and elbow I woke up with today. It was more than worth it.



We hope to go back as many times as possible this year. For those of you who don't know, Coney Island is being replaced. You heard it right. Coney Island is being replaced by condos and one of those overpriced amusement park things like Six Flags or something. Soon the Cyclone and the Wonder Wheel of Astroland will meet their doom. I can't help but be against it. It is a historic land mark and I think they are making a mistake to mess with it. Sure, its old and worn down but there in lies its charm. I am sure the changes being made are fiscally responsible for the owners - whoever they are. But it still feels like a mistake and it makes me sad. I like being able to walk around take in the all of that Americana. I am not sure I will want to bother visiting some bright and shiny new park...





We skipped the ridiculous line at Nathans this time and instead bought our junk food on the boardwalk. Corn dog, fries, funnel cake, corn on the cob, lemonade and beer. We responsibly split each of these items - to keep from lapsing into a grease coma.


Last night we had our friends Adam and Nicole over for dinner. We threw some kabobs on the ol' grill and then sat around visiting, stuffing ourselves with freshly grilled veggies and pineapple and the fabulous pasta salad that Adam and Nicole brought. It was such a nice visit and I wish we had done it sooner. These sort of days make me wish the summer would stretch on a little longer.



Today I woke up with a migraine so we had to skip church. After I finally recovered we walked over to Sunset Park, picking up some fresh tacos on the way. We sat under a shady tree looking out at the city across the river and enjoying our lunch. Wondering why anyone would want to live over there. We decided that we were sure they had their reasons and they were probably very good, but we were also sure that we much preferred the peace of Brooklyn and were glad we both felt the same way on the matter.



What a view.

Stephen is working in his studio and I am watching episode 3 in Ken Burns "Civil War". If you have never seen this I highly recommend it. It is not only fascinating, but has the effect of making me feel closer to my fellow Americans and the history we share. We have been on a Ken Burns kick with Netflix lately. Last week it was "Civil War" and "The Shakers".

Hope everyone else is having a nice lazy Sunday afternoon.