Yeah.. so the whole moving to Florida thing.. that's not happening. I guess I underestimated that .0000001% chance and it's exacting its revenge upon our life plans and goals.
So we are staying put here in Brooklyn. Yay. No seriously, yay. I really do mean it...yay. Well maybe not as "yay" as the cute little yellow house I had picked out for us in Sarasota.... but .. yeah, Brooklyn is a "yay" . Not as "yay" as the great little yard that Oliver would have been able to run in or the garden area I would have grown tomatoes and parsley in but..sure.. "yay" is appropriate, I think. Yeah. Yay for Brooklyn and for subways to ride and laundry to push down the sidewalk. Yay for no washer and dryer in our house. Icky! Who wants to do their laundry right there in the house?! That's just no fun at all! No it's much more fun to carry your groceries from the store in Union Square down through the subway halls to the train and then stand in the crowded car with your bags before walking the 5 blocks from the 36th Street stop to 193A and our 3rd floor walk up. SO much better than having a car to and a parking lot and a kitchen on a ground floor. Gross!! Yeah, you guys out there in the suburbs just don't know what you are missing out on man! I got serious muscles and I haven't worked out like.. ever! It's all from just trying to live in this concrete jungle. Pretty convenient actually. It is all good. You know it! Word! Word to your mother 'n stuff. Word to your grandmother even. Yo.
I pretty much don't want to talk about the whole saga anymore but I will say that in the end Stephen and I decided that it just wasn't the right decision and even though we were still waiting on a definitive answer on whether the position would even be available (%$#@#?!?!!!?!) we came to the conclusion that it was just not the right choice. There were multiple factors involved in this decision but the main two were A) time and B) money. Not enough of either to warrant relocation from our comfy little abode here. So, there you have it ..in a nutshell. Sorry ya'll. Feel horrible that everyone in our lives had to watch this train wreck but hey.. that's just the risk you accept in reading this particular blog. Hope it hasn't been as painful for you as it was for us.
We are happy with our decision... just a little bruised right now. It's been a long 3 months. We have big plans for our remaining time here. We are constantly reminded that we have no idea how long (or short) that might be. At any rate, one of those big plans is to find a new job for Stephen. So that's our next big undertaking right now.
I am fighting being pretty down and struggling to keep it together lately. This is made infinitely easier by the people I work with and the fact that we are constantly working on events for our Summer Associates. These are always fun and we have an amazing class of summers this year so that makes it all the more enjoyable. Of course being with Stephen is the icing on the cake. Being able to come home to him at night is what keeps me sane and despite my internal battles and biting back the occasional storm of tears at my desk, I am able to smile and keep it light. This is merciful since allowing that much emotion to engulf you is pretty exhausting in every way.
So after all I have said in this post.. I hope that I will not bring up Florida again, but that I can just move onto the next phase gracefully and completely. However I can not promise this so.. just in case I slip up ... please keep some forgiveness and patience on hand.
Love you guys out there.. thanks for everything.
10 comments:
* i'm coming through in october on my way up or down from MA. does that mean i get to see you?
Ok, that leads to my next question, which you can email me about if you'd like. So, did they ever call back? Did he ever get offered anything? Did Nathan get the new job? Oh, whatever, I'll just call... =) Love you. Feeling your pain.
Yeah, Jane, we will be here! :)
We will have to hang out for sure!
Ok, for those of you that are concerned about Sarah's current state of mind, I called her this morning, and she's doing better with the whole thing, though still not thrilled about lugging her groceries through Brooklyn. The job, upon further investigation, was not going to be what they had originally thought it would be, and they would've had to leave in a big hurry to make it there on time, so, that horse is dead. But they are revaluating because of this whole experience, and that is positive. Just thought I'd give everyone in blogland additional info so Sarah doesn't have to answer additional questions. Diana, you can delete this if ya want. Just trying to be helpful. =)
Man we really love you guys and reading about your life. Thank you for being so transparent. What is most encouraging is that you are real and life is real. Keep up the good work even if it feels crummy. You are a light in the darkness, I wish we could have a week or two together just to talk and hang out. Guess we'll just have to blog and keep on trying to talk on the phone. Take Care, J.
I don't know how some people manage to get burning bushes but God has never written answers in the sky for me. He does however close and open doors and bring the right words forth from places I trust. I have faith that my life has meaning and a purpose and I know that there is a path that is meant for me. I'm happy you know this too even though limbo-land is rough and not being able to see all the way ahead is hard. Amen to looking at the good things you would have missed and enjoying them now. And Amen to relishing this time with Stephen before the little monkeys come along. Praying for you girlfriend:)
Adam came home after Nathan's opening and told me that you were staying. While I'm sad for you guys since you were SO hopeful, Adam and I are very happy that you're not leaving. Although we don't get together very often, Stephen and Thomas have been so central for Adam as good friends. So, maybe I'll be the only one to post this, but selfishly we're not dissappointed! We are looking forward to you guys staying, we never got to go shopping together, we still have more dinners to get together for, and the guys need to do the guy stuff. I hope that cheers you up, plus once you get your anthropologie discount card you'll be glad you stayed in nyc since you work right NEXT to anthropologie.
Just found out tonight Erik might get sent to Afghanistan for a year. Life is so strange with plans that change and the turns they take. Still processing. Trying to be reflective and positive and not worry. Being put to the test right after saying that to you and I still believe that this is our path if it happens but I don't understand. Can't imagine how this could be good in any way for our little family. Hmmm. Hugs to ya...
Michelle Michelle Michelle.
Beautiful sweet precious encourager. Stephen and I started praying as soon as we read this. Our hearts are with your little family right now and I only wish I could be as encouraging to you as you have been to me in the last week. So strange how we both find ourselves on paths that confuse and yet we feel that we were put there by Him for some good reason. We are standing with you guys.
friend i have been thinking and praying for ya'll---i'm just glad God closed the 'door' before ya'll got down there and realized this isnt what you were thinking. i am praying for something better--im praying that a new 'season' will come your way...one with a yard a room for a garden and oliver to play:)i love you sarah.
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